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Thinking about this, you may wonder what the chances are that a relationship that starts as an affair will succeed.Pitfalls of Affair Relationships Relationships that start as affairs have many strikes against them. They can arise out of an urgent emotional need, a need so urgent that a thoughtful process of getting to know someone and assessing what kind of partnership the two of you would have is not part of the bonding process.These are just a few of the questions that will run through your mind after discovering a partner’s sexual betrayal and sex addiction. You want to, first, encourage the betraying-spouse to take care of himself or herself while you seek support.Next, don’t make any permanent or rash decisions while the feelings are raw and fresh.In the first couple years of my healing process I kept saying stuff like “well in all fairness to my mother, I was not the perfect daughter because of…. Just like I was trained to do; I was trained to look at me, always to look at me and my faults and to take the blame.Looking at my faults is not such a bad thing, but the lack of mutuality in our relationship is a ridiculous thing.And I set out to prove that I would never do something ‘like that’.This is the brainwashing; this is what happened that caused me to try harder with her and to try so hard to ‘understand her.’ I tried to reassure her, to soothe her and to be the daughter she always wanted.

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Questions or concerns about the preceding article can be directed to the author or posted as a comment below.

Good is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, medical treatment, or therapy.

Always seek the advice of your physician or qualified mental health provider with any questions you may have regarding any mental health symptom or medical condition.

Before this decision is made, or things are said that will be difficult to overcome, take some time to work through each of these steps.

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Again, if there is going to be hope, and eventually healing, each partner will have to be committed to first focusing on themselves and then, when each is at a safe place and most likely with the guidance of a therapist, they can begin to take steps to restore their relationship. The preceding article was solely written by the author named above.“When someone is unrelentingly critical of you, always finds fault, can never be pleased, and blames you for everything that goes wrong, it is the insidious nature and cumulative effects of the abuse that do the damage.